Friday, February 27, 2009

peanut butter jelly time

okay so some bitch put gum in my hair. UGH. went to bogie's bar tonight and some BITCH ASS MOTHER FUCKER put green gum in my hair. lorr* got it out though thank god with peanut my hair smells like peanut butter and fruit because i tried to wash it out since i was too lazy to take an actual shower. uuuugghhh. i wish i knew who put this gum in my hair because i would legitamitely fuck her face up. i know some people might laugh if they heard me say that cause they think i'm really nice and too small and petite to kill anyone, but if someone seriously pissed me off and if it was some sorority girl bitch i would seriously kill her and i am NOT afraid to fight someone. seriously? i'm certified in everything possible thing EVER \uugghh I'M SO PISSED RIGHT NOW THAT SOMEONE THOUGHT IT WAS OKAY TO PUT GUM IN MY FUCKING HAIR. UUUGGHHH.

okay anyways, besides that, i was so drunk tonight (maybe that would explain why i didn't notice a bitch putting gum in my hair) that i started CRYING at bogies...what the fuck. i literally haven't cried forever? like maybe even more than a year. and yet i'm so f-ing drunk i cry in a public place...for literally no reason. emburrassing.

i keep getting whiffs of my peanut butter smelling hair. its disgusting.

i honestly want to get into a fight with whoever put gum in my hair. i bet i would kill her. sure, i would go to jail for killing someone, but wtf. it would teach mother fuckers to think twice about whether or not its okay to put shit in my hair.

i ate cane's...a kid's meal. i almost spelled kid as jud. i like cane's...i tried to diet today by eating a salad for dinner but of course i spoiled it by eating fried food..and fries.

hopefully my roomie and amy don't hate me for crying openly at bogies. maybe they will forget? also....xtine* disappeared tonight with ellie*.... where tf did they go? questiioonnnss....

also....i'm sad. and happy. kind of like barney. he's sad but happy, right? yes. barney the purple dinosaur. OH MY GOSH. BTW I WORE HEELS TONIGHT TO BOGIES! and din't fall down. impressed? me too.

operation water: drink it.
once again i cannot think of something wiity to say... my horoscope said i was witty today with the right amt of sarcasmmm....

okay. i'm tired.
NOT like f-ing blair waldorf.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

like your bandana

okay so i can't believe that i'm drunk right now. and the last few nights, i was semi i'm drunk right now, let's just be honest. okay? yeah. so hopefully to nights thing will be really entertaining. so amy and ellie (add the astericks, please, cause thats not their real names) and they wanted me to take then out upt. well...i agree, but of course i forget its mardi gras day, when no one goes out and everyone sleeps cause they're tired from being drunk for four straight days...soo we go to the boot, and its empty. we stay for a while, but eventually, me and z decide its time to leave. but mistake. not only do we get lost, but when we end up at the bars, three of them are closed, and one of them is emptyy....

so we go to this guy's friends' apt, where he invited amy cause they......"talking." let's not bullshit, shall we? he;s an asshole. a big hole of ass. ok? i will not like cause seriously? i won't lie, i don;'t even remember what he was saying, but the whole time he would say smething i rememebr thinking to myself "what a douchebag".

okay so today me and z when on a crawfish GOOSE CHASE. crtazzzyyy., we endded up buying it from some asisn corner store....figures...asians are the only ones that open up shop in the midst of a holiday. FIGURESSS.. but the crawfish was good. ecept not as good as kp's parents.

ihad an epiphipany while i was in the car? first let me discalimer: i'm secretly rly bitter.
no one falls in love like in the songs and movies. no one. so get over it and just assume that every guy that wants to talk toyou is in it for one reason, and its not to find out your fave color and childhood playtime activity. get over it. your life will never sound like taylor swift's songs. get oovveerr it.

i'm watching fresh pricne....and i have rice waiting for me to eat.

i loveeeee ths craziness. i thkink to myself..."what a wonderful wooorlldd"

louis armstong anyone? plz?

Monday, February 23, 2009

do you want lotion? no i just want the pain to go away

okay so my hand is realllyy dry and craklin like pigs feet anddd z* offered me lotion and i just want the pain to go lotion. i actually hate lotoin because it makes me feel slimy. SLIMY. okay so we just came from orpheus, the last night parade of the mardi gras season (sad face) and...had a margarita ( a really strong one from superior grill) and we bought a 12 pk of bud light from kiwky mart...haha the indian lady like quizzed z on her birthday and address it was funny. the guy next to us was like "mann these girls look like 45 yrs old, come on lady!" haha it was funny cause we def look lik 12 years old. awesome.

yyayaa soooo we hung out with the high school crew for all night basically...they had huge speakers in th emiddle of st. charles street and we were dancin in the street til like at least an hour after the parade ended. then eventually the police came and were like...yall gotta leave...

then kp's* dad came and picked us hahaha not that weird since we were at her house earlier and her dad dropped us off..CRAWFISH BOIILL!! sooo good...not crayfish...CRAWFISH. represent that deep south okay?!?!? if only you could hear my voice righ tnow..... its ghetto faabbb. yayyayayaya sooo we as in z and me hung out with kp's parents for like 2 hours until i sobered up and could drive home...but they don't know that's why i hung out with them...

and then we got popeyes.

again. sooo much popeye's this season.

sooooo frat boy xyz texted me last night..."are you still in nola?" yes butthole, i live here. i want to kill him. i dont even rememebr what he looks like. what does he look like? i don't know, don't ask me, ask someone else.


love ya missss yaaaaa...(why would i mis syou? you're here all teh time...)

Sunday, February 22, 2009

bacchus is macchussss

dunno what the title of this blog means i just thought of it. went to thot then bacchus today...started early which would explain my lack of complete sentences. had a HUGEEEE headache but sid* gave me some MEDICCCINNNEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOO. tylonel. woo. woow. woooooo. okay, so ya...beginngin of the day, while i was looking for lala* and sid* a float was passing by so i starting yellin fo some beeadds and this guy made eye contact with me and was holding a hand full of GLASS BEADS!!! And he was like...yeeaahh i know you want these and ima give em to ya. and sooo he threw them RIGHT TO ME. and...SOME BITCCHHH stepped in front of me and GRABBED THEM. we both had them in our hands at the same time, but i was like...whatever...a fight is not worth it. bitch thought she was doing me a favor and gave me one of the beads....ugh those beads were mine. I HATE HER.

anyways. now i'm sleeping at sid's. her friends from california are in town...its so fun to see them be amazed at everything. they didn't know the difference between gumbo, jambalaya, and etoufee...i mean, seriously, they're completely different things. they even laughed openly when they heard people say y'all...i're in the south. i would laugh if i DIDN'T hear that shit. but they're cool, if not soooo west coast.

so. i love bands. marching bands. no other types, just that. i wanna play the trombone but i'm untalented and useless in music. i would say i play piano..but how the hell are you supposed to lug that down teh street in a parade? you cannot. its useless. A USELESS SKILL. just like roller skating.


p.s. the mouse pad looks like an oriental it.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

strangers are friends too

strangerrss...but not reaalllyy.. that's how i always feel whenever i go to functions that sid* my roomie is involved in. She hangs out with this group of people every so often but its the same group of people that hang out with the same groups of people everytime...and i've met them all several times, but not its always really awk. cause i know you but i don't know you. i remeber your name, but do you remember mine? its always weird cause what do i do?....say hi like i'm excited or pretend that we've never met? i compromise instead and look really excited by opening my eyes really wide but not actually saying hi...if they don't make eye contact, it means they're avoiding knowing me...and if they do make eye contact, that means its okay to say hey. either way i end up looking psycho crazy with my eyes like that.

ssoooo Z* and i went out to the parades together, as usuall....but she brought em* along with her who we used to work with and lives in virginia. she's cool and all, but she was in such a grumpy mood all day i feel. we parked far away and had to walk really far, but i mean, that's expected...anywhere we parked would be far unless we got there at like 6 in the morning. but the whole time we were walking she was kind of complaining...and then later that night after the parade had ended all her (and z's) friends were downtown partying but i HATE downtown and i'm not really friends with all those other people? i wanted to go to this other party that i thought we were going to go to but we started walking down town friend kp* said she would pick me up but i had to walk towards her away from traffic and em* didn't want to walk anymore and duyen didn't want me to walk alone though...i knew em would get mad so i told her to just let me walk alone even though i felt kind of uncomfortable walking alone....soooooo long story short, em whined and i ended up walking alone which was REALLLYY scary esp in downtown new orleans.

thank GOD kp picked me up. so we went to the party which was mediocre and i saw burt* there and bitched him out because he promised he'd pick me and z up when really he was LYING and just said that but had no intention of picking us up...i straight up bitched him out. i wish i had a bat to hit him with or a knife to cut him. i want to kill him. why didn't he just tell us he wasn't picking us up? we wouldn't have wasted so much time waiting for him. what a DOUCHEBAG. hey btw do you like how i keep cdapitalizing key words? i like it.

ssooo yeah everytimei write a blog i try to think of something funny to say but it just never happens...why am i so humorless when i'm drunk? itslike...i hav nothing funny to say.

oh my gosh, but just a worldly obsv....this world is SO small. everyone f-ing knows each other. just gotta say that. p.s. frat boy xyz pissed me off and i think i was a bitch to him. but i feel like that's a common theme. i was verryyy judgmental tonight. contrary to popular belief though i had a good time.

lllooovvvee yaaaa


Friday, February 20, 2009

greek gods are cruel

okay, hellosssss

its the night of the parades morpheus and d'etat...i love mardi gras. we barelycaught anything but saw all our high school friends and got REALYYY drunk. okay. so here's how drunk i shouldn't be...i'm the designated driver. so this is what it think what happened: we walked like one hundred miles to this party on calhoun st. z knows about and the guys were HUGE DOUCHEBAGS (the guy throwing the party that duyen knew wasn't even thurr)...i think one of them asked me to watch their cig and it burned me so i dropped it on the floor so they wouldn't let me smoke the bowl so i got offended so we left...i felt bad for making z feel as if she should leave but i was seriously pissed. soooo...i think i called alex and he was in a diff city so he called his MOM and she came and picked us up. CRRAZZZYYYY!!!!! SSHHHIIIIIITTT..


WHO CARESSSS I JUST NEED A PET DOG. thats IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and money. a pet dog and money. that's happiness.

and a phone charger cause my phones about to die....

miss ya loves ya blogt tomorow nights maybe??!?



Sunday, February 15, 2009

drunk texting

thank god my drunk texting isn't that bad.
woke up this morning (vveerryyy dehydrated) and found a pleasant text from frat boy xyz:

"so you do anything with your bf today?"


Friday, February 13, 2009

Practiced Drunk

Sober while writing this cause last night I was too drunk to stay awake long enough.

However, I must say that I am becoming quite the accomplished drunk. I mean, while I did jump out of a moving car last night and sprint to the house...I also ate spaghetti and drank lots of water before bed and walked myself up the stairs all by myself! And I even changed myself into my PJs, took off all my jewelry and got myself into bed! All that and I didn't even remember.

So last night I tolerated mediocre/unattractive and socially awkward boys for the privilege of free drinks at a friend's house party. Among other notable occurrences, a girl stepped on my foot in the bathroom with her spiked heel and I yelled out very loudly and repeatedly "HOLY FUCKIN' SHIT"...there was a strange frat boy that made faces all night and called me darlin' (which I replied with, "Why are you calling me darlin'? What does that MEAN to me?!")...and a cop showed up to the house party.

Sorry this is sober. Next time I drink (which could very well be tonight...again, and DEF saturday...hellloooo, it's carnival season in the big N.O.!), I'll def post! Much funner that way.


Thursday, February 12, 2009

Welcome to Shotzz


okay so this idea came to me ...I'm drunk. And I'm drunk all the time. And I think about things that I KNOW i don't remember in the morning so why not blog about them while I'm drunk so the next day I can see?

So here I am. Tuesday, a boy in my brit lit class *who i don't know the name of* invited me to see his band play at north gate tavern. I wanted to go because i secretly thought he was cute *but didn't tell anyone that because what if they came with and thought he was NOT cute?* plus i felt like i was blowing him off if i didn't go....but i didn't wanna go alone. so i went to LL's instead with MD and got pretty drunk...i kept asking to do more shots. so then we went to ngt and i went in but he wasn't there. ... great. tomorrow i have to apologize. i totz went to see if he was there only two hours or more later. GREAT UGH. I'M A WORTHLESS HUMAN BEING.

i need to die.

welcome to double vizion.